The Burnout Chronicles Part 2 – The Breaking Point
It wasn’t always this way. Prior to this role, I had been able to maintain a sense of balance. I had set clear boundaries between work and my personal life. But somewhere along the way, I had lost that balance. It wasn’t just my work suffering—it was my relationships, my mental and physical health, and my very sense of self.
I had experienced a medical scare in the past, which sent me to urgent care, then a lab for additional bloodwork and lab tests, but the results (thankfully) came back okay, so I carried on with my work as if nothing had happened. The news should have been a wake-up call, but in the whirlwind of meetings, deadlines, and expectations, it barely registered. I was too deep in the trenches to even process it. It wasn’t until I spoke to a physician that the full weight of my situation hit me. I was clinically diagnosed with severe anxiety and severe depression, and the doctor recommended medication just to help me get through the day.
The Cost of Success
The success came at a cost. I had been dreading the mornings, my mind filled with dread at the thought of facing another day under that crushing pressure. I had become so consumed by the work that I had no room left for myself. I had become a slave to the grind, unable to escape the endless demands that came with the job. I was living in a constant state of anxiety, never able to rest or recharge.
I was working 16+ hour days, juggling 11-15 meetings daily, and squeezing in actual work during the little time I had left. I couldn’t even allow myself the space to have a breakdown because I had to rush from one meeting to the next. The pressure was suffocating, and there were moments when I physically started trembling in the middle of meetings from all the stress. It felt like I had sacrificed everything that was important to me—relationships, family, hobbies, exercise. My health deteriorated rapidly.
I experienced stress-induced health issues that sent me to urgent care. I lost 17 pounds in a matter of just two months, underwent bloodwork and lab tests, and I began to realize why my former colleague took those medical leaves and ultimately decided to resign—I was going down the same path that he once did.
The Final Straw
The burnout was too real. I had been running on fumes, doing whatever I could to keep going, but the truth was undeniable. I couldn’t continue living this way. I couldn’t let my family suffer for the sake of a career that had become a prison. I needed to reclaim my life. I needed to find a way out.
I reached out to my former colleague as a plea for help, hoping to understand how he managed through this situation, and he immediately jumped on a zoom call with me. “Listen to me. It’s not you bro, trust me. I was in your shoes just a few months ago, and looking back now, leaving was the BEST thing I ever did. I’m so much happier now.”
For months on end, I tried to convince myself that it was just part of the job—that I had to keep pushing forward, no matter the cost. Those who were closest to me saw the toll that this was taking on me, and tried to convince me that I needed to step away. My wife even encouraged me to quit numerous times, telling me that everything would be okay even if I did (and she was absolutely right), but let’s be real, my pride and my ego didn’t allow me to let it all go so easily.
It wasn’t until I spoke to a physician that the full weight of my situation hit me. I was diagnosed with severe anxiety and severe depression, and after the initial medical scare that I had experienced just a few weeks back, this news put everything into perspective.
NONE of this was worth it.
The Resignation
It wasn’t a decision I made lightly. There were so many factors to consider—the financial stability, the career I had built, the fear of what the future would hold. But at that moment, I knew it was the only choice. The burnout was real. The toll it had taken on my mind, body, and spirit was immense. I had to step away before there was nothing left of me to give.
I had missed countless social gatherings and events with friends, birthdays, and most importantly felt so distant from my own family. I had no idea what was going on in my son’s school and life, and the little time that I spent with my family and friends, my mind was thinking about work—I was physically there, but mentally absent.
I had never felt so empty.
So, I made the hardest, yet in many ways, the easiest decision of my life: I decided to resign.
I realized that nothing—absolutely nothing—was worth sacrificing my health, my happiness, and my family’s well-being. The money, the prestige, the accolades—they meant nothing in the face of my own deteriorating mental health. I had allowed myself to become consumed by the job, and in doing so, I had lost sight of what truly mattered. My family, my friends, my happiness—I had pushed all of that aside in favor of a career that, in the end, was destroying me.
The cost was too high. It wasn’t just about the work anymore—it was about reclaiming my life.
The Aftermath
Walking away from that toxic environment wasn’t easy, but as my colleague had told me before, it was the best decision I ever made. How did my toxic manager handle the news? She did not bat an eye—I was simply just another easily replaceable employee in her world… or perhaps it could also be because I reported her to HR as my “F—you” mic drop moment before my departure (more on this in an upcoming post).
Leaving wasn’t just a career move—it was a decision to prioritize my mental and physical health. It was a decision to reclaim my life, to find joy again, to restore the balance I had once had.
Looking back, I can see now how unhealthy that environment was. The pressure, the blame, the unrealistic expectations—it all contributed to a toxic culture tha chewed people up and spit them out. But stepping away from it, freeing myself from that cage, allowed me to begin my healing journey from the trauma—a journey that is still in progress, but has allowed me rediscover who I am outside of a job title, and toward finding the happiness that I had long been chasing but never seemed to reach. It’s been a long road, but I have absolutely no regrets.
If you’ve also been struggling with burnout, feel free to reach out, and I would love to hear your stories. Know that you are not alone and your job does not define you.